I had a very interesting experience while sitting in shrine on Saturday morning. My shrine for Netjer is not that big, just a small rectangular stool covered with a white cloth, a statue of Wepwawet at the center, along with a bowl for offering water, prayer jar, jackal incense burner, candle, and some jewelry which lives there when I am not wearing it. To the left are two paintings, one of Wepwawet and Seshat by one of my brothers in the House, and a papyrus painting of Seshat alone. To the right stands a tall bookshelf filled with all my magical books. I’ve bought some new titles lately, and thanks to lack of room, several of those were sitting on top of the books already shelved. So the bookcase was looking a bit messy. In fact, all of my bookcases suffer from the same affliction on a regular basis.
As I was sitting there, having my daily time with my Dad, I was also looking at the books and noticing some of the titles that just seemed to be taking up space. I found myself thinking that I wished I could get rid of some of those books, but felt too attached to having them.
Which is when the Opener of the Way decided to put in His two cents on the matter.
When Wepwawet speaks to me, it’s rarely in full words or even phrases. I get that a few times a year. He seems to go for something beyond words, communicating to include the range of sense, especially feeling.
In that moment I Felt like I HAD to get rid of some of those books. They were unneeded and had to move on. I started to pull books off the shelf: titles I’d read ten years ago and never references again (even if I liked them), things I would never read, things which, through a quick scan, proved to be unneeded or full of material I already knew. But it was not easy to take those books off the shelf and prepare to sell them. As a matter of fact, I felt extremely nauseous during the procedure. That sensation did not ebb for almost two hours.
But once the culling began, I knew I couldn’t stop with that one bookcase. I went to the other two in my bedroom and pulled off yet more books I never got around to reading, and even some which are contrary to the place where I am in life now.
In the end I got rid of 20 books. 20 books out of a few hundred. It’s amazing how much that hurt. The nausea didn’t subside until well after I’d listed the books for sale and rearranged the shelves.
It’s also amazing how much the cliche holds: I did feel like a weight had been removed and the energy in the room was moving more freely. It felt good.
Whether this was Dad giving me a lesson in learning to let go of things, or my higher self doing it, or just a weird set of coincidences and I’m just way too attached to these bound pieces of paper, who really knows in the end. I know what I experienced, and how I interpreted it. It brought about some good right away as well, which is called sold books online.
Learning to listen like this does take a long time. It’s not just the message that counts, but developing the relationship to bring you to a place where you can get such messages.
What is standing in your way today? What can you clear up? What can you allow in?
How can you learn to listen?