I decided sometime in late November or December that my theme for the year would be reboot. After everything I have handled over the last few years, it seemed like the best idea. This month has been something of a washout. Between going back to work and adjusting to that, and Eddy’s passing, it feels like I am floundering most days.
Some things have helped. Last week marked 70 days since my mom’s passing, so I did the Kemetic prayers for her. Her presence in the Unseen world is strong and I feel her ready to work for me from that side. I appreciate it.
This past weekend I also adopted two cats. The house had been too quiet and I wanted some other moving life here. Allergies be damned! We’re all still adjusting to each other, but my boy is already showing he’s a big mama’s boy of a cat.
Despite this generally suckastic month, I did decide on some resolutions for the year and do intend to find some way to make them happen.
1. Make the house I inherited into my home.
This isn’t just changing around the furniture and removing a bunch of my mother’s possessions which I don’t want to keep. I want this place to be mine. As the year goes on I will be working different magics around the house toward that end.
2. Finish the homework for the hoodoo correspondence course.
Eddy would occasionally prod me on this one, as he was a graduate. I first signed up at the end of 2005. It’s one of those things where the partial problem is other parts of life getting in the way. The other is wondering if I know what I am doing enough to make it happen. And that leads into the third one…
3. Re-establish spiritual and magical practices.
Before mom went into hospice I realized that daily senut was too much for me. With all the reorganizing going on I want to move my shrines out of the bedroom and set them around the house. So far it’s been hard for me to figure out places. They need to be somewhat accessible yet not in the main line of traffic, and now not in places where the cats can knock them over.
I also want to get myself more attuned with the various cycles of the year. Lunar, European holy days, then Kemetic calendar, and Vodou feasts. Not too much to ask for, right?
Which brings me back to the title of this post. Whether it’s Imbolc, Ewemolc, Charming of the Plow, or Candlemass, the greater themes for this time of year center around preparation, beginnings, and healing. My intent is to put together some spellwork and a small rite I can do to mark the tide. The only way to get past my blocks is to work through them, and stop letting doubt and worry take center stage instead.
In an amusing turn as well, tomorrow’s dark moon is also slated to be a day long cleaning up at work. Trust me, we all need it there.