I’m too tired for this stuff

If I wait until the stars align for me to write a full post again… I’ll never write a full post again. But I wanted to put updates and some thoughts into text somewhere, so this is my best shot.

1. This past weekend was spring Pagan Pride Day in my state. I haven’t attended many but this one was the best in terms of presentations. The first of the day was herbal aphrodisiacs, presented by a local herbalist and giving an introduction to some herbs and roots which can be used for intimate stimulation. We also got treats, like damiana liquer she had made, and bliss balls with damiana and horny goat weed included, along with tinctures of a few more herbs. The other win was a discussion on baneful plants. I already have some experience there with my use of flying ointments, but got some other ideas for how to work with the plants.
Siduri and I are also thinking about pulling together a small workshop with the aphrodisiacs woman with a few of our friends. It’s also a nice affirmation that I do know a few things about a few topics, even if I can’t act on them as much as I’d like.

2. Now way way behind on the Youtube Pagan Challenge. Sad for this, since so many of the topics are 101/foundation stuff I’d like to have chronicled in some way. I might try to pick up on it some this weekend. People, feel free to keep on me for this.

3. Health is… health. It remains a struggle. One achievement I’ve had recently is not eating my heart because I haven’t been able to take care of self-set tasks. That’s liberating. Also, I am going to see Pearl Jam on Sunday, and will be in the standing space in front of the stage. And I’m not too worried it will drain my reserves to do this. It’s a small step, but it is a STEP.

4. A thing which has been bugging me with the last few months of various words between bloggers and assorted declarations: I have a vantage point which seems to show a whole lot of echo chambers waiting to happen. It bothers me.

And now to found it out, have some spring leaves and mandrakes from the Beast Peddler enjoying herbal goods at aforementioned Pagan Pride Day!

early blooming

Londo, Haxa, and Vissa were delighted by this playtime.

Londo, Haxa, and Vissa were delighted by this playtime.

In which I get shinies and film them!

I’m kinda liking making Youtube videos. It does tend to go a lot quicker than writing and I am less likely to forget ideas. (boo on you brain)

In any case, last night I got shinies in the mail as well as at work so I decided to show them off. Enjoy! And if you can, please view directly on Youtube. They apparently have a setting where embedded views do not count in the overall tally.

Triple dose of videos

I seem to recall during the fall that I had kinda promised myself I would write up several posts for this little old blog of mine. It’s either been I don’t have the spoons or don’t have the time, which isn’t fair to anyone. Least of all me. But it seems like doing these videos has me thinking about what to write and what to say. Plus new format appeals to my ADD brain. (Yes I have ADD. Does this really surprise anyone?)

The Youtube Pagan Challenge is also giving me a chance to talk about subjects I probably would not otherwise cover, because they’re not on my inner radar for things to discuss. So consider these background information if you don’t already know me well. Or if you do but I have left out parts of my personal narrative.

Right now I am dangerously close to up to date with this challenge. Don’t worry, I won’t let it go to my head.

Week 2:

Week 4, complete with a special guest!

Week 5:

Taking up the challenge

After several takes, a few stalls, and some days of just spacing out and forgetting I can film, I’ve started in the Youtube Pagan Challenge. Some of you are taking part, but if you’re not, it’s a series of questions to be answered in video format. The challenge is already on week six, but I have this and week four already done. Maybe by the weekend I can pull off being up to date with the question. Enjoy!

Featured Image -- 1361

Love of the gods.

My sister in Jackal Sobeq speaks volumes on having real love for the Gods. Plus, I miss writing.
Beloved Jackal Dad, please obliterate the obstacles in the way of my moving forward, and in the way of my Doing and Creating. Kheperu.

carrying their light

I’ll be the first one to admit that my perspective on all things Kemetic is fairly insular. I don’t look too far beyond the Kemetic Orthodox community. I browse Tumblr but don’t really engage much. So anything I speak about is going to come either from what I’ve learned in the House of Netjer, or what I’ve learned through my own interaction with the gods. All this is to say: I’m not the most informed on what other people believe, so I’m speaking purely from ignorance here and nothing more. (It’s possible that, given my ignorance, I should just keep my mouth shut — but where’s the fun in that?)

I’ve noticed huge diversity in how people describe their divine relationships. There’s some who almost give off a sense of distrust for the gods, as though They were so capricious that they might turn and bite their devotees on a…

View original post 398 more words

12 Nights of Yule for 2015: Hagalaz and Nauthiz

Hagalaz: What upheavals have I dealt with?

Nothing much new for this year. But the upheavals of the last few years are still sorting themselves out. I’ve managed to get some of them settled though. That to me is a major achievement. And maybe this year I’ll handle a few more.

Nauthiz: What do I need?

Most of all I need a lot of physical contact with other people and a few weeks of sex, to start. (Not had any for about four years, and now you know.) A lot more free time. Focus. Physical energy. Someone to plan my meals, especially the ones which go with me to work.

12 Nights of Yule for 2015: Gebo and Wunjo

Wow I am running behind hard on all these. Epiphany is almost upon us even (I’m involved with Vodou as well, so even though I did not spend any time as a Catholic I’m kinda aware of the holidays now) and I am not even a third of the way through these. But since I can’t seem to rouse myself enough to tidy around the house or unpack more, and am just at the end of Jessica Jones, I want something else to occupy my brain.

Gebo: What gifts have I given and received?

For giving, well, Yule just passed, along with a wedding, and I’ll admit to indulging in some generosity this year. It was good to do but I need to work on making more gifts and better planning.
Received? I got some nice things over the holiday. But my better gift this year has been the company of people. That tends to be what I want more than anything now.

Wunjo: What has brought me joy?

People I care about. My cats. My nieces and nephew. Some media. Warm weather.

12 Nights of Yule for 2015: Raidho and Kenaz

It’s either been a super crazy or super relaxed time on this vacation. On Monday there was minimal movement throughout the house as we all recouperated from the holidays and wedding. Last night was also, quite possibly, the first House of Netjer meetup in the state of Florida. We ate Ethiopian food and talked for many hours. It would have been longer but enough people had to work today that it made things impossible.

Today I did not get out of bed until almost noon and have spent the day in pajamas. Now this is what I call a vacation.

Raidho: What journeys (either literal or spiritual) have I made this year?

The literal journeys have been Pantheacon in February (and I have never had a con where I’ve been so tired throughout the whole weekend), New York City in July because I am a fangirl, and now in Florida.

Spiritual journeys this year take two forms. First there is the trance work, which has been limited to holy tide celebrations. The second has been new deities on the personal radar, coming from cultures with which I have not interacted. These are still in their infancy and I have no clue where they might go.

Kenaz: What have I crafted?

I’ve made some spells, I’ve knitted, I have colored. Nowhere near enough, but I did it.

12 Nights of Yule for 2015: Thurisaz and Ansuz

My nephew got married today. It was a lovely service and I got to dance with one of my nieces. Oh, and caught the bouquet and had a 17 year old boy putting the garter on me. I may have worn a cougar dress but I was not expecting that in any way.

In other excitement, there will be a Florida gathering of members of the House of Netjer this week. So so excited for this!

Thurisaz: What obstacles stand in my way?

I can identify two with ease: my health and anxiety. The first I went into some of it yesterday. The anxiety has developed as connected with the first. It’s difficult for me just to start anything because there is no guarantee of being able to complete whatever it is. And having more piles of stuff around my house just leads to more anxiety. If anyone has suggestions of how to deal with this (I don’t have a PCP so medication is out, and for me it’s not the step I want to start with.)

Ansuz: What inspires me? How do I inspire others?

Inspiration is in living, in my chosen family, my Unseen ones, even my cats. Seeing other people able to lead “normal” lives, in that they do not have to chose between one activity or another unless they want to be wiped out for days, makes me want to continue caring for myself.

How I inspire others? I have no idea at this point.